I have been absent for a while on this blog. Honestly, I have been so busy with the
comings and goings of everyday life that I haven’t taken the time to do
anything other than exist.
He’s gone again. The
first week was pure hell around here. Everything that could have gone horribly did. We are in our third week of separation and
life is smoothing out a bit here on the home front. I realized, and it took nothing short of piano
falling on my head to realize it, that I can not do everything for everyone all
of the time. So, we dropped swim for the
summer and baseball. I am attempting to
get in touch with my interests again. Parenting is hard (understatement of the century). College isn’t really very difficult, but
college monopolizes every spare moment of my life. So, I also put off my last several classes
until Chris returns from Iraq. In the
beginning, I viewed this most recent delay of my needs as an assault. I was angry and resentful that, yet again, I
have to put everything on hold so Chris can go be a Soldier for a bunch of
people who don’t honestly give a shit if he comes home in one piece and
breathing, or in little bits in a box. I
mean, Americans talk a big talk, but as soon as the commercial is over, their
thoughts are elsewhere. I’ll blame it on
iPhones and fast food. Surely, my fellow
Americans are not that callous on their own.
Right?
In less than a year we left Hawaii, and our friends, and the
beaches, and the salty air and we moved to the stark and brilliant desert of Arizona. We were there eight months before we were
packed and shipped to Kansas. That is a
break-neck moving even for the most experienced gypsy. I guess, we were destined to have a break
down at some point. The fact that the
kids have done as well as they have in the face of such a daunting year is
remarkable. I fervently stand by my
claims that military brats are the toughest bunch of kids out there. They are the most resilient. They are the most compassionate. They are inspiring. They are the most brave. So, as I was melting down last week, my kids
were fortifying their doggedness to make it through another deployment, to
adjust to their schools, and to discover new friends. With company like that, it’s hard to keep
feeling sorry for myself.
